Making Your Dreams Come True

[Excerpted from the Hero Soul ezine on Personal Growth]

Critic Melody Breyer-Grell, of the Cabaret Exchange - New York, wrote the following on Canadian Tenor, Ken Lavigne’s Carnegie Hall debut:

“His voice seemed to be liquid gold, a pure lyric sound that had surprising undertones in his unforced lower range.”

Performing at Carnegie Hall was a lifelong dream for classical singer Ken Lavigne. And while it seemed like an impossible dream to play at the Big Apple concert venue that hosted such legendary greats as Pavarotti, Sinatra, Nat King Cole, and Tony Bennet, Ken Lavigne believed in his dream.

He didn’t wait for the phone to ring or for his ship to sail in. Instead, he spent several months raising money for his cause performing at various concerts and fundraisers, in the midst of a severe economic downturn, with many of his friends and family telling him he was absolutely nuts.

At 35, Lavigne, using his own money and funds raised, invested $200,000 to rent the hall himself, hire the New York Pops to accompany him, and do his own advertising! He inspired teams of friends to get the word out about his upcoming concert date.

Lavigne may have been crazy, but on January 22, 2009 he sang his heart out at Carnegie Hall and got to fulfill his lifelong dream, feeling the exhilaration of performing to a live audience of over 1,000 people. His performance was well-received by critics and producers began calling him. Had he waited to be invited, the party may have passed him by.

It’s sad to see so many people waste away their lives in quiet desperation waiting for that elusive knock on the door, waiting for something to happen – instead of making it happen. If you have fallen into this rut, and are waiting for conditions to be ‘just right’ before you embark on your dreams, I want to encourage you to put these petty fears aside and dive into actively making your dreams come true. Start now!

And for those of you who already are actively taking steps to reach your dreams, I would like to urge you to “BAM! Kick it up a notch!” as celebrity chef, Emeril would say. Ask yourself, “HOW can I be bolder and more courageous in my approach? How can I turn up the heat and ‘kick it up a notch’?”

Put more HEART into your actions. Show that you care, and people and circumstances will conspire together to help make your dreams come true.


To your success,

Sharif Khan
http://www.herosoul.com/
Freelance Writer, Consultant, Speaker
Author of "Psychology of the Hero Soul"
An inspirational book on awakening the hero within
(As mentioned in Reader's Digest, USA Today, Toronto Sun)

"Everyone has a HERO locked up in the deep recesses of their mind…when you discover it, your self-image will skyrocket you to previously unimagined rewards. As your eyes travel from one page to the next, you will suddenly become aware of the masterful job Sharif has done in guiding you to this special place. I love it, so will you."
-Bob Proctor, philosopher, star of The Secret movie

Improve Your Human Relations Skills


Whether you are a business owner, employee, artist, student, or parent, one of the greatest assets you can have for enjoying a happy and successful life is mastery of good people skills.

I’m a Dale Carnegie nut! Having recently re-read his classic bestseller,
How to Win Friends and Influence People I’m convinced that Carnegie is one of the top five human relations experts in the world.

If there’s one curriculum that’s sorely lacking in high schools and colleges, it’s a course on human relationship-building. If you want to be a great people person and a great communicator, I highly recommend making a lifetime study of his classic book and would also like to suggest taking The Dale Carnegie Leadership Mastery Course.

(Click on the link for more info: http://tinyurl.com/qyg3np).

Persistence Pays! Eagle vs. Raven

Which bird has better odds of winning in a fight for survival, the eagle or the raven?

If you placed your bets on the eagle, the bigger, stronger creature of force with powerful talons that can rip apart the smaller raven, you’d be mistaken in this unique case.

You’ll have to see it to believe it in this remarkable video that reveals one of nature’s greatest mysteries:
http://www.pbs.org/wnet/nature/episodes/ravens/video-raven-intelligence/1549/
(click the Raven Intelligence ‘play’ button)

When I watched this video, I was in sheer awe of the true majesty of nature and the lessons we can learn from her. What really struck me was the fact that the Raven made 7 attempts to win its prize from the eagle.

Wow! What a powerful lesson! Studies show that it takes about 7 marketing impressions before a target consumer decides to buy. This natural principle applies to advertising, sales, and many other aspects of life. Most potential customers need to be approached approximately 7 times before they’ll convert their ‘no’ to a ‘yes’. And yet, over 50% of sales people give up after the first rejection!

Thought for the day: How can you apply this ‘raven technique’ to improve the odds of winning in your job search, business, or day-to-day life?


Interview: Awaken Your Inner Hero in Tough Times

Carrying on with the theme of persistence, in this inspirational audio interview, I share with you my message of heroic leadership in tough times: http://tinyurl.com/dyrvxz
(You may have to refresh your screen).

Note of interest: In this interview, I address a call from a struggling first time author finding it especially difficult to be heard in the midst of this economic crisis.

Sharif Khan
http://www.HeroSoul.com
Writer, Consultant, Speaker
Author of "Psychology of the Hero Soul"
An inspirational book on awakening the hero within
(As mentioned in Reader's Digest, USA Today, Toronto Sun)

Obama Leadership: 8 Ways to Lead in the 21st Century

“I destroy my enemies when I make them my friends.”
– Abraham Lincoln, 16th President of the United States


The world is looking for a new kind of leader who can bring hope and stability in dark economic times. President Obama could very well be that leader. Only time will tell. What can we learn so far from Obama’s style of leadership? Here are some observations to note for leading in the 21st century:

1. Survival of the Fittest

Charles Darwin spoke of survival of the fittest belonging to the species that is not necessarily the strongest, but the most adaptive. Obama was strong, bold and fiercely determined at the very start of his campaign. But what catapulted his success into the stratosphere was how his communications team adapted to the power of the internet to engage voters through various online social media channels such as Facebook, Myspace, YouTube and Twitter, and by developing a powerful web presence that helped raise over half a billion dollars online for his campaign.

2. Foes to Friends

Will Lincoln’s “team of rivals” strategy of appointing campaign opponents to his cabinet work for President Obama? That remains to be seen; but Obama has shown so far that he is a charismatic leader who can successfully put differences behind and get opponents onboard his team using charm and intelligence. Although easier said than done, an enemy turned into a true friend can prove to be a loyal ally. On a broader scale, Obama’s consensus building approach to international relations by seeking to understand before being understood and welcoming multilateral decision making, could help ease world tensions and maybe even convert certain enemy nations into allies. Naïve yes, impossible no.

3. Lead by Example

On his first day of office, President Obama froze senior White House staff salaries exceeding $100,000 and promised more openness and transparency to “make government more trustworthy in the eyes of the American people.” His example sends a clear message to the public that his leadership team is willing to share in the sacrifices necessary to turn the economy around.

4. Bold and Swift Action

Rhetoric has to be backed by action. In his inaugural speech, Obama spoke of ‘bold and swift’ action. From the decision to close down Guantanamo prison in a year, to vowing to pull out American combat troops from Iraq in sixteen months, not to mention the herculean task of getting Congress to pass an $800 billion-plus stimulus package, Obama has so far delivered on his call for ‘bold and swift’ action. Leadership is about judgment – the ability to make decisions. Some of the choices may be wrong in retrospect, but leadership, like a river, must keep moving forward.

5. Admit Mistakes

It takes a special person of character to readily admit mistakes. When Tom Daschle pulled out of the nomination process for the post of Health Secretary after controversy over his personal tax records, Obama admitted, “I screwed up.” He was sincere, direct, and to the point. True leaders earn respect by honestly admitting their mistakes. False leaders are despised, and their plans eventually undermined, because they hide behind their title or position and blame someone else for their own mistakes.

6. Maintain Poise

Whether in a public debate, press conference, or media interview, Obama has shown his trademark signature of remaining cool, calm, and collected by neither overreacting nor underreacting to curve ball questions and attacks. When all is said and done, the person who can keep cool when others are hot is usually the one to boss the job.

7. Powered by Purpose

One of the reasons why President Obama has such a high approval rating is that people see that he is driven by a genuine sense of moral purpose. While he could have easily pursued a high paying corporate law career, Obama chose civil rights law practice instead and served as a community organizer who took a grassroots approach to improving his community in the South Side of Chicago. He is a caring and compassionate leader who burns for justice. In perhaps the greatest transfer of wealth from the poor to the rich in the history of America, Obama expresses outrage at Wall Street execs who pocketed billions in bonuses from taxpayer bailout money and calls for a ‘new era of responsibility’.

8. Hope Rooted in Reality

Abraham Lincoln once said, “You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.” With unprecedented access to information today, it is becoming nearly impossible to fool all the people even some of the time. People want the facts and aren’t fooled easily. Leaders who make the mistake of blind optimism or obscuring the facts are in for a rude awakening. Without the facts, without the proper diagnosis, the disease will only get worse and spread.

President Obama understands this phenomenon and is a leader who provides hope rooted in reality. With sobering resolve, Obama is telling his people that they will have to hunker down, roll up their sleeves, and work hard to rebuild the American dream; a dream that may take more than a term to rebuild, but that can become a reality – with the audacity of hope.


Sharif Khan (sharif@herosoul.com; www.herosoul.com) is a freelance writer, consultant, speaker, and author of the inspirational leadership book, Psychology of the Hero Soul. He publishes his Hero Soul ezine for cutting-edge advice on success, leadership and personal growth. To contact Sharif, call: 416-417-1259.

This article is excerpted from Sharif Khan’s Hero Soul ezine and is copyright © 2009 by Sharif Khan.

Fear to Focus

Excerpted from Sharif Khan’s Hero Soul eZine on personal growth:


"We have nothing to fear but fear itself."
– Franklin D. Roosevelt, 32nd President of the United States

In a global meltdown that has spawned a media frenzy which has all but crippled the masses with fear and panic, the world needs a strong leader like FDR who was able to successfully lead his country out of the Great Depression. Someone like Pope John Paul II who can say with steely resolve, “Be not afraid,” and mean it in every fiber of his being. And back it up with action!

How can we put fear behind us in these turbulent times and take back control of our lives?

With the Canadian Thanksgiving behind us and the American Thanksgiving just around the corner, perhaps its time to reflect on the things we can be truly grateful for in life and focus on our dreams instead of the mass hysteria that the media is fueling.

I’d like to propose a POWER WEEK focusing intensely on your goals and dreams with a significant scaling down of news broadcasts you watch and listen to.

While there’s no denying that there is a major downturn in the economy requiring a major adjustment, whatever we focus on expands. And for many of us, the media serves as our focusing lens. The problem is that the lens is focused longer and more often on the problem rather than the solution – to the point of such intensity that it burns a metaphoric hole in the collective heart of society.

Why not reclaim that power by focusing your time and energy on how to achieve your dreams?

I’m not advocating tuning out of all news and becoming indifferent to the problems of the world. I’m just recommending turning down the volume of doom and gloom and turning up the volume of the desired outcomes you want out of life.

You can ‘turn down the volume’ by significantly reducing the amount of time you spend watching and listening to the news on TV and radio. I subscribe to the NY Times headline news that comes into my email inbox everyday. It’s customized to my preferences and I can scan the important news quickly without having to spend hours getting emotionally carried away by some news broadcaster telling me how bad the economy is.

Likewise, I use my commute time wisely spending a large portion of my time listening to educational audio programs or classical music and instrumental jazz – instead of negative song lyrics and repeat news flashes.

The constant negativity in the news can make the bright imagery of our dreams fade away into dull grays. To ‘turn up the volume’ of your dreams, intensify the sights, sounds, tastes, smells, feelings, and colors as you visualize yourself every morning and evening doing what you’ve always dreamed of doing – as if it were happening right now.

During your POWER WEEK, I’d like to suggest getting up every morning and writing down your most important goal (in the present tense as if you are already enjoying it) at least 7 to 10 times with focus and concentration.

You may wish to write this goal down on a small card that you can look at throughout the day. I also recommend spending a few minutes in the shower every morning to reflect on everything you have to be grateful for in life and ‘bathing’ in these good feelings if you will.

The point is to use whatever personal growth methods you feel most comfortable with to make this your best POWER WEEK ever!

If you’re looking for an extra boost to help undo the negativity that may have creeped into your system in the past few months, then I highly recommend attending NY Times Bestselling Author, T. Harv Eker’s Millionaire Mind Intensive * which includes a new segment focused specifically on how to be successful in today’s economy: Millionaire Mind Intensive (click on the link for a preview or to register).

* Note: Seating is limited on a first come, first served basis. Your reference number is: 215975

This is an awesome event that will help raise your prosperity consciousness in turbulent times!

P.S. There is also the Millionaire Mind Teleseminar that you can listen to as another option:
Millionaire Mind Teleseminar


To your prosperity and success!

Sharif Khan
http://www.herosoul.com/
Writer, Consultant, Author of Psychology of the Hero Soul
An inspirational leadership book on awakening the hero within
(As mentioned in Reader's Digest, USA Today, Toronto Sun)


This article has been excerpted from Sharif Khan's Hero Soul ezine on personal growth, leadership, and success. To subscribe now, visit: www.HeroSoul.com and click on the “newsletter” button.


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Reader's Digest Profiles Hero Soul Online!

Reader’s Digest recently profiled my book, Psychology of the Hero Soul (http://www.herosoul.com), in an article exploring the unique qualities of heroes and how to develop these attributes in ourselves to inspire greater success.

The article is titled, “Is That a Hero in the Mirror?” Here’s the link for your reading enjoyment: http://www.readersdigest.ca/specialfeatures/heroes_2008/cms/xcms/characteristics-of-a-hero_1048_a.html

The Hero Soul is an inspirational book on awakening the hero within to develop your leadership potential and is available in most major bookstores. [ISBN # 0973192208].

“Everyone has a HERO locked up in the deep recesses of their mind…when you discover it, your self-image will skyrocket you to previously unimagined rewards. As your eyes travel from one page to the next, you will suddenly become aware of the masterful job Sharif has done in guiding you to this special place. I love it, so will you.”
~ Bob Proctor, philosopher, star of The Secret movie

“Psychology of the Hero Soul will leave you inspired by the triumph of the human soul and show you how to harness the forces within you to live your highest life.”
~ Debbie Ford, author of # 1 N.Y. Times Bestseller, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers

Pursuit of Happiness

Back in June I had a dream where I was lost. I was in a sprawling home flipping through a glossy magazine with pictures of celebrities. Oddly, a picture of my father appeared.

I then put on my father's light green olive suit. (To me, green is a spiritual color, a cool color that radiates harmony and balance). The suit fit perfectly. It felt good and I found my sense of direction.

I took this dream to mean that I will be undergoing a change in lifestyle and philosophy and that symbolically trying on my father's clothes will help usher in this change.

Synchronistic events began to transpire. My participation in the Canadian Cancer Society's Relay for Life put me in touch with someone who was a grad student at University of Toronto where my father had received his PH.D. I asked this person to look up my father's thesis in early childhood development and he was able to check-out the book for me from the university library.

Shortly after this event, I paid a visit to my Mom's place and was pleasantly surprised to find a couple of large boxes in the guest room containing some of my father's old correspondence. (My brother was finally able to retrieve these after years of collecting dust in the garage of a previous home we had lived in).

So here I was, after all these years, reading my father's thesis and sifting through his photos, certificates, and correspondence - metaphorically trying on my father's clothes. This was the first time in my life that I was able to acquire a deep understanding of the scope of my father's work. (My father passed away twenty years ago in a car accident - so as you can imagine, it was an emotional experience).

Among the papers, I also came across my own drawings and stories I had created as a kid that my father had painstakingly kept in good condition. I marveled at the creativity and imagination I had displayed at such a young age. (As early as the fifth grade I was showing an aptitude for writing, art, and storytelling with lots of A's and commendatory notes scribbled by my teachers).

I remember feeling so much joy and delicious wonder as a child entering into my own dream world. But somewhere along the way, I lost touch with that divine spark and pure innocence. It was not until many years after graduating from university that I was able to reclaim that spark by writing my book, "Psychology of the Hero Soul."

The hero's journey is about finding that dreamland we left behind as kids - and returning home. What makes us lose touch with that divine spark within?

Perhaps it is in our very pursuit of happiness that we have lost our way. For so many people (in America it's part of the constitution as an ‘inalienable right') are pursuing happiness and yet are unhappy and unfulfilled. What's the solution?

In his bestseller, "Man's Search for Meaning," Dr. Viktor E. Frankl, a man who endured years of suffering in Nazi death camps, wrote, "...Success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side-effect of one's personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself...Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge...In the long run...success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think of it."

Instead of fixating on the outcome, focus on the process - on happily achieving rather than trying to achieve happiness. Focus on providing service through your core work and bettering yourself.
Don't be afraid to experiment - worrying about what other people will think. Do your own thing. Follow the promptings of your spirit and the gentle whisperings of your soul. Follow your own natural curiosity - back to dreamland.

And don't be afraid to try on a new change of clothing from time to time...You just never know where it might take you...

To your happiness,

Sharif Khan
http://www.HeroSoul.com
Writer, Author of "Psychology of the Hero Soul"
A book for inspiring the HERO in YOU!

This essay was taken from my FREE Hero Soul ezine on personal growth. If you enjoyed the write-up, I encourage you to subscribe to my newsletter by visiting http://www.herosoul.com and clicking on the 'newsletter' tab.

Shower People with Love

My younger brother, Junaid, passed away recently after a two year battle with cancer. He died as I was holding his hands at Sunnybrook Hospital in Toronto on March 19, 2008 at 11:10am. Our whole family was there at his bedside when he passed away. He was only 33 years old.

I did not make a public statement at the time because we wanted his funeral to be a small family affair with mostly close friends and relatives. I also needed time to reflect privately and go through the grieving process. Journaling my experiences since that time has helped me to cope.

Especially difficult to bear was the fact that just over a year into my brother’s illness he had made a miraculous recovery after enduring several rounds of chemo, radiation and various alternative health treatments. (When Junaid was first diagnosed with stage four base-of-the-tongue cancer, he was given 7 months to live with less than a 10% chance of survival).

Unfortunately, a few months after the recovery, the cancer reemerged with a vengeance. The tumor at the base of his tongue started growing and eating through sensitive nerve and gum tissue – eventually devouring part of his jaw bone.

The pain was so excruciating (despite all the different pain meds he was on) that he wanted to end his life on many occasions. Just trying to manage the pain was an ongoing struggle with frequent visits to his pain doctor. It’s a horrible, horrible disease that no one should have to go through.

I’m astounded at the enormous courage and inner strength my brother displayed throughout this whole ordeal. His dream in life was to become an actor; and despite his weakened state and slurred speech, he kept on auditioning for parts even though he kept getting turned down repeatedly. I’ve set-up a Tribute Page for my brother with an actor photo of him on the Canadian Cancer Society’s webpage that I’d like you to visit: http://convio.cancer.ca/goto/junaidkhan

He lived and died honorably and was the most honest person I’ve ever known. I’m very grateful for the time I had to spend with my brother before he passed away. He is my role model and hero who taught me many valuable life lessons from his example.

One day when my brother Junaid was staying over at the hospital, a friend of his dropped by our home hoping Junaid would be there. I protectively blocked the front porch entrance and told him my brother was not in. He had a grip of steel when we shook hands and I immediately formed an impression about this person.

I later told Junaid about his friend dropping by and mentioned that he looked a bit like a street thug. Without missing a beat, my brother covered the trach tube in his throat with his fingers and strained in a raspy voice: “He’s lived a hard life and has no one to love him. You have to shower people with love – because nobody else will.”

My knees almost buckled as I fought back tears. My younger brother was teaching me a lesson in humility and love. I was ashamed of myself for having judged someone I barely knew.

I learned that my brother had befriended a number of people that most of society had rejected, and he showered them with love and kindness.

What a powerful message. I believe we can all make a difference in the world by showering people with love. And it doesn’t take much. A kind gesture to a neighbor. Catching someone doing something right. Warmly welcoming a newcomer who feels out of place in a group. Visiting a sick co-worker at the hospital. Lending a helping hand or giving encouragement to anyone that needs it.

Shower people with love.

You know, I’ve spent a longtime trying to figure out exactly how to break this news to you. In my desire to honor my brother and raise awareness in a big way, a crippling paralysis overwhelmed me - rendering me incapacitated and not knowing what to do.

How ironic that I found the answer to my problem in my own Hero Soul book! In the chapter titled ‘Peace’ I began with Anne Frank’s quote: “How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.”

I’m taking Anne Frank’s message to heart by not waiting and starting now. I’m volunteering for the upcoming Canadian Cancer Society’s “Relay for Life” to help raise funds for cancer research and support services while celebrating cancer survivors and remembering loved ones lost to cancer.

Please visit my tribute page to help make a difference: http://convio.cancer.ca/goto/junaidkhan

(If you’re able to make a contribution, please click on the “make a donation” button under my brother’s photo).

Let’s do our part in making cancer history so we can help save lives and prevent someone from going through what my brother had to go through. Let’s not wait – let’s start now!


Love and Light,

Sharif Khan
http://www.HeroSoul.com
Author of "Psychology of the Hero Soul"
An inspirational leadership book on awakening the hero within


P.S. If you’d like to learn more about Relay for Life or would like to pledge me, visit: http://tinyurl.com/4vbp4p



*** Please help me to help a good cause and raise awareness for cancer research by publishing or sharing this post with your contacts and spreading my brother’s message of love. ***